The press has been full this week of snaps of our girl, Fag Hag and diva extraordinaire trotting round Paris Menswear Week on the arm of her lover and partner in crimes against fashion, Monsieur Kanye West. This one, taken at the Kris Van Assche show, is nothing more than a style disaster on some very shapely legs, and proves the mantra “if you’ve got it, flaunt it” has its limits. It’s a classic case of a sleb with one helluva hot body taking it a step too far, and turning up to the red carpet, well, naked. Think Jodie Marsh’s impeccable taste, Samantha Mumba in that spider-web dress, et cetra, et cetra. Girl, if we looked better naked, would there be any point to fashion at all? Leave something to the imagination, please!
The irony is, as Mesdemoiselles GaGa and Knowles have proved time and again over the past year, the body-suit on its own is a hot hot look, and right down and dirty with our ethics here at ‘Fag Hags. Now perhaps a flesh-coloured one is a bit too dull, but something a bit spicier would have cut it. The dress in itself also is not neccesarily a problem, but it was clearly designed to be worn with summat a wee bit more substatial underneath. It doesn’t flatter her curves this way and the thick black band of material across her thighs cuts accross her legs and shortens them, making her, in the land of size-zero-is-size-normal, look like a bull in a china shop… But we shall forgive. Fashion risks mean fashion errors, and that in itself is superior to staid and safe. The styling in general is hella fierce, and maybe we need to think less about flattery than force. And on the man front, we love ‘Nye’s shoes!
Next, there was the fur. Back in Febuary last year, Kanye West pissed P!nk off something shocking; apparently at Stella McCartney’s show, while sitting with her, PETA vice president and Papa McCartney, Mr West ranted on about how little fur he could see, and how much he loves the stuff. Now while ‘Nye could be forgiven for not knowing that Stella and Paul McCartney and P!nk are some of the biggest anti-fur activists around, to say this in front of a top Peta guy is unreal. Clearly he is just looking for attention… again. Rocking up to the Louis Vuitton show decked out in this with Amber on his arm, he has certainly stirred the blood of many once again; the same Peta VP has likened the pair to “pathetic creatures from a shabby roadside zoo.” Fur is a hot topic these days, as well as a hot look for the hard hit times, but if West and Rose are doing it to grab headlines and insult people, it’s for the wrong reasons. And there is just a bit too much of the stuff here, it completely lacks taste. Brash Americans, what can we say?
Which brings us to the final showstoppers of the day. This hyooge furry fannypack (don’t you just love that word?) complete with pockets is a piece of fashion genius, and the hunt is on for something of similar proportions on the blessèd high street. the cropped top and denim jacket complete the 90s vibe. all u need now is a pair of round sunnies, pal. And the woolen all-in-one she rocked up to Chanel in is a fashion risk that worked – definitely leaving the imagination to do its own work and, if Amber didn’t already have a shavved bonce, has a high-fashion Grace Jones air about it. You pulled through bbz, thank God.